I’ve been doing my no-spend challenge for a little over 2 months now, and it’s time for an update, according to rule number 6: Keep myself accountable.
I’ve realised I don’t spend much money in the first place, so there was little point imposing a restriction!
I made the rules, which means I can break them too, and downgrade the challenge to include clothes only. I will continue with a clothing shopping hiatus until September 30th, which marks a year of being involved with Project 333.
I pledge to not buy a single item of clothing, shoes, or accessories until at least October 1st, and only after I’ve evaluated my entire clothing collection.
Bonus rule: If I am given an item of clothing, and want to keep it, I will need to get rid of something from my current collection.
Things I have learnt from the challenge:
1. Over time, I realised that imposing rules on spending allowed me to continue "not deserving things". I have always found it incredibly difficult to justify spending money on myself, often seeking reassurance from those close to me that it's ok to buy a mug, or a new item of clothing, or my camera. Spending money on myself actually challenges me to believe that I deserve something, and thus imposing a total ban just helps avoid that challenge. I've reasoned that a total ban is actually counter-productive to my recovery, given that I hardly ever buy anything other than the essential food and consumables.
2. I made progress with justifying expenditure for courses and experiences; and have booked two online courses, one finished and the other starts tomorrow! I had a great time on the first course with Tammy Strobel, and am about to experience the delights of Susannah Conway's teaching on Journal your Life.
3. I have learnt that I can stop impulse purchases altogether, and instead put things on a list for a few weeks to see if I really want them. Such was the case with the camera, and the new mug I am in search of. The mug has been on the want-list for several weeks already. I’m in no hurry to acquire it, but I know I can buy it when I find the right one.
4. I have no need for new clothes. I have around 110 pieces in total now (reduced from 150), not including shoes or accessories, and only wear a selection of 33 items for each 3 month season. I have identified a gap in my wardrobe, which may get filled eventually, but again, there is no hurry, and if I still feel the gap is there in October, I will go and purchase a suitable item.
5. Spending money on experiences, such as short courses and trips away is infinitely more valuable than any item I could find in a shop. Focussing my spending on this area has been worthwhile and a lot of fun.
Overall, I think I have really learnt that I need very few objects or material things to be happy.
Insights to take forward from here:
1. Placing items on a want-list allows me to evaluate if I really want them, and prevents impulse buying.
2. Tracking expenditure on experiences has been very helpful, and has allowed me to book courses that I would have trouble justifying otherwise.
3. I don’t need to worry about over-spending, but a budget is still helpful.
Over to you
Have you tried a similar challenge? What did you learn? Do you find it easy or hard to justify new purchases? I'd love to hear from you in the comments.
Deserving or Not Deserving are tricky concepts when it comes to deciding whether to make a purchase. I had a friend who talked a lot about "deserving" purchases. She would spend on treats because she deserved them, but she never had any spare cash. I used to think she "deserved" to have some savings behind her and less financial stess. This kind of rewarding or witholding way of thinking doesnt seem like a helpful way of making a shopping decision. If self worth equates to spending and non-worth equates to non-spending you can end up over shopping to prove your worth or avoiding shopping and feeling deprived.
ReplyDeleteHi,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you about "not deserving" things situation. A wants list really works for me because it means I shop at home first to see if I already own the thing I think I want then if I don't I can focus my shopping trips. I am generally hit with an overwhelming feeling when I'm in a shop, particularly a clothes shop so a list helps me to block out a lot of the stuff that would turn my head or leave me screaming for the exit!
It helps me to reinforce the "I am not my stuff" thing too. If it's on the list it means I have, in a non-emotional, pressure free moment decided that this thing is something that would help me get on or help the things I already own work better so it's easier to keep perspective about the item. My husband is very good at reminding me "it costs what it costs".
Hi Linda, thank you for stopping by and taking the time to comment.
ReplyDeleteI hadn't actually thought of it that way, that it could go that far. My utmost priority is always to afford to live, and I have always been careful with money.
I agree that "deserving" treats would be counterproductive too, if I solely attached my worth to owning more/better stuff. Thankfully, being without, and stopping spending altogether has taught me that I don't need stuff to make me happy, and my worth is not dependent on what I own.
Thank you for the great point, and I will be mindful of your insight :) I may even expand into a new post at some stage. Thanks for the input! :)
Hi Thrift deluxe, and thank you for taking the time to comment.
ReplyDeleteYes, I agree, a wants list takes the impulse out of buying, and you make a good point about it being a non-emotional, pressure free moment. Then we can distance ourselves from our "need" for the item to see if it really would add value to our lives.
I don't particularly like shopping for that reason, the overwhelming "searching everywhere" , and yet I'm drawn to them. I seem to be good at keeping my purse firmly in my bag though!
You mention a great point - we are not our stuff :)
Hope the thought is helpful to some of your readers. It was that word "deserving" that triggered the memory for me about my friend and her struggles, which might be a bit different to what you were describing in your own situation. There certainly is something to be explored about the link between feelings of worthiness and of deserving or not deserving.
ReplyDeleteI've been on a shopping ban for one month now. Unlike you, I have noooooo problem spending money on myself, lol! For me, the hard part is resisting the "you deserve it!" message from so many advertisements. But I guess there's another extreme, if you're unable to justify even a simple purchase of something like a mug.
ReplyDeleteBtw, you should post a picture of your mug when you find it!
Hello Minimal girl, thanks for coming over! :)
ReplyDeleteI honestly didn't think about the other end of the spectrum when I wrote the post, so I thank my readers, incl you for pointing it out to me. I guess if you have no trouble spending the money, "you deserve it" messages are just one more reason to keep on doing it. that's why I'm against {most} advertising, because it makes us believe something that isn't true, that we need this new thing to make us happy, or for a "treat". I guess I've never seen many of them, because I found it almost impossible to spend money on myself in the first place.
I think I found my mug, will post a picture soon!